Be aware of what you are tolerating.
Early in my coaching career, I was privileged to take several courses from Thomas Leonard who is regarded as the father of the modern coaching movement. One course, “Become a Toleration Free Zone,” was a literal eye-opener and has been a through line in much of my client work since then.
The basic premise is:
- Things are all around us that bug us or zap our energy in some way.
- We get use to them (tolerate them) and turn a blind eye.
- They still bug us and zap our energy.
- When we take an inventory of all of the areas of our life that have incompletions or those things that bug us, we become aware.
- Developing a strategy to systematically address and eliminate the tolerations, we begin to have our energy and good-nature restored.
Look around you, are there piles of paper that silently taunt you? Do you accept the same criticism from one person time and time again without saying anything? Is a crucial part of your strategic plan left dangling? Are you always “meaning to get to” that car repair?
Now let’s look at the organization. Is there someone who needs your feedback that you will get to “someday?” Are you noticing someone struggling to keep their commitments but you are too busy to coach and counsel? Do you have a disgruntled employee that you turn a blind eye to because it’s unpleasant?
Am I bugging you with all of the questions?
What is the impact of tolerating and not taking action to clean up?
- YOU HAVE NO ENERGY
- You are not focused on what is most important
- Toleration can spark into fire – then you have a disaster to clean up
- Disaster recovery takes you out of purpose and passion
You get the picture.
I’ve seen one too many relationships unraveled, careers derailed, and employees visiting attorneys to not bring attention to this.
What are you blindly putting up with? What are you tolerating? How much more freedom and space would you have if you just took care of things in the moment?
Here’s a little coaching:
- If the paper pile is really bugging you, toss and file.
- If the employee is disgruntled, engage heart and mind and have the conversation.
- If you need to forgive, do it.
Figure out what you are tolerating, open your eyes to what you’ve not been willing to see and then make a plan to complete it.
Have You Ever Wondered About Your Level of Emotional Intelligence?
One of the aspects of transformation is self awareness. At the base of transformation is self awareness intertwined with emotional intelligence. If you are curious about your Emotional Intelligence skills, I’ve created a quiz for you. A few short questions and you will receive your results and a little extra coaching by email to help elevate from where you are now.
