Listen Like Your Business Depends On It (Because It Does)
Unlocking Business Potential Through the Art of Active Listening.
“The closer we get, the more time I spend at each door listening to people hungry to talk: passionate, informed, anxious, angry. I’ve been especially moved by the young men. Feeling in the thick of it, yet surprisingly calm.”
– Lee, Political Canvasser
The quote is from an old friend who has taken on the rigorous task of door-to-door canvassing for the last few months of a down-ballot political campaign. She is doing the heavy lifting of LISTENING. You might think she would choose to spend her time TALKING, but instead, she is choosing to LISTEN.
It can’t be easy to knock on every door, never knowing what beliefs, ideas, or anxieties will emerge when it opens. Yet, she cares strongly enough for the people to gather her courage and engage face-to-face. She has also shared how much this has changed and shaped her as a human being, truly recognizing the humanity in all whom she encounters.
I share this story because it’s apropos to how we lead our businesses, especially in times of change or uncertainty. The importance of deep listening is emerging as more and more people are longing to be heard. This requires us to put aside our agendas for others so that they may express themselves. There will be time enough for discourse… but this is about listening to your people. This is at the heart of the humanized leader.
What if you were to knock on every mind in your business and listen, listen, listen – as if your life (your business) depended on it? What would that look like?
How to Listen with High Intent
Pulling from the ideas taught in The Humanized Leader, here are some ways for leaders to listen with high intent:
- Practice Active Silence: Resist the urge to interrupt or formulate responses while others are speaking. Instead, focus entirely on absorbing what's being said.
- Use Reflective Listening: When you summarize or paraphrase what you've heard, you're less likely to tune out and wait for your turn to talk. Additionally, when your speaker clarifies, you can understand more.
- Ask Open-Ended Questions: Encourage deeper conversation by asking questions that can't be answered with a simple "yes" or "no." This allows your team members to elaborate and share more meaningful insights.
- Implement Regular "Listening Walks": Schedule informal one-on-one walks with team members, creating a relaxed environment that fosters open communication. More importantly, teach your other senior leaders to do the same.
- Re-craft One-on-Ones and Quarterly Meetings: Or implement them if you don't currently have them. Adopt a ratio of 80% listening to 20% talking.
This is not always easy. You generally know what you think, and the expedient thing is to have others come into compliance with your thought process. This approach is backward if you really want to see your business soar, driven by a strong culture of commitment.
Practice Emotional Regulation
To get there, you must also practice emotional regulation. My friend from above can tell a tale or two about having to gather her passionate point of view off the tracks of a potential runaway train of her own opinion. Again, she intentionally listens. Become the thermostatic leader through your own intentional listening.
Cultivate self-awareness and recognize your own emotional reactions and biases when they come up. This includes becoming aware of and preparing for topics or situations that typically provoke a strong emotional response in you (triggers).
- Use breath control and practice active mindfulness to stay in the present moment.
- Consciously suspend judgment, becoming aware of the internal dialogue of evaluations or criticism.
- Exercise empathy and attempt to understand and relate to the emotions behind what's being said, not just the content.
In this way, you can maintain your emotional equilibrium as you create an environment where team members feel truly heard and understood.
So, what happens when you don't like what you hear?
It’s crucial to manage your response carefully. A good measure is to assess Response vs. Reaction. Responsiveness keeps you in leadership, while reaction leads you into drama and righteousness. Acknowledge your feelings, resist immediate debate, respond thoughtfully, and avoid attacking the other.
Mostly, do what Lee does: express deep appreciation for the honesty, willingness to share (even if you disagree), and for the privilege of the dialogue.
Your Challenge
The challenge is clear: step out of your comfort zone and into the realm of deep, intentional listening. Embrace the power of silence, empathy, and open-mindedness. Make it your mission to knock on the doors of your team’s minds, ready to hear and understand their truths. By doing so, you’ll not only transform your leadership but also unleash the full potential of your organization.
Remember, true leadership isn’t about having all the answers – it’s about creating an environment where every voice is heard, valued, and integrated into the fabric of your business.
Today, commit to becoming the listener your team needs, and watch as your business thrives in ways you never imagined possible.
Mary Pat Knight is CEO of Leaders Inspired – an executive coaching and consulting agency devoted to the development of emotionally intelligent leaders. She is also the author of the Amazon #1 International Best Selling book, The Humanized Leader.
The ground-breaking new book, The Humanized Leader: The Transformative Power of Emotionally Intelligent Leadership to Impact Culture, Team and Business Results, is now available in Kindle, paperback, or as an audiobook. To get your copy – or extras for your team, click the button below.